Raising Kings

I was a young single mother who had the pleasure of raising three handsome boys and a beautiful daughter.  Once married, not only did I gain two additional bonus sons but my husband and I created three sons from our union.  Yes, you have that correct.  We have EIGHT sons (K.I.T=Kings in Training) 👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑

  Realizing there were no easy roads, or handouts from anyone, We began focusing on their future.  I understood how powerful we had to be to raise these young boys to be productive young men.  We had to make sure the men that were involved in their lives, would have a productive impact.  Their father, uncles, male cousins had no real concept of "it takes a village" meant.  Reaching out to teachers, ministers, and other males to assist in teaching lessons, showing them how to stand up straight (something about the shoulder alignment made me smile), how to wear a tie, how to read and comprehend, and how to be men.

 We had to teach our sons how the world would view them because they are boys of color.  Yes, my daughters are girls of color (black girl magic runs through her veins) but for our men, the focus was different.  We had to teach them how to be strong in the face of adversity, be quiet in the face of opposition and be mindful of the company they chose to call friends.

Being a young man of color is far more difficult than I could EVER image. How can you expect your male child to have positive outlook if there aren't any positive images.  The ones they see are men who have stopped growing.  You know the ones that are emasculated, over-stressed, seemingly angry males.  You know the ones that have been in and out of jail for doing things (unlawful things) to provide for his family.  The males who are under-educated and super proud so they do not know how to ask for help.  We made a firm decision we would do better and expect more.

When our sons chose us to be their parents,  we chose to not only raise them with every power and inner strength handed down from generations but we also vowed our sons would NEVER be a statistic. We vowed that our sons would break any bar that had been placed below their feet to raise it above ALL.  We vowed that no matter what, we would NEVER give up on our children or allow anyone to expect any less.  We vowed that we would be the parent that would speak to teachers when my child excelled or struggled.  We vowed that our sons would NEVER know the pain of being told "no; your not qualified; you should quit; or you are being placed under arrest".

My husband and I put in place a check and balance to make sure our children knew how to "be seen in public". Be respectful to your neighbors....honor your elders....be the example of EVERYTHING you don't read in the newspapers or see on TV.

So why do I say my children are royalty when society has claimed they will wear metal bracelets vs a beautiful crown. History of constantly being told that people of color are lower than/less than.... has been the cause of many K.I.T. to no only not understand their full potential but do not understand how to place pride, intelligence, and self worth into the heart and souls of their future children.  Our families continue to struggle with the mental crown they have to adjust when it tilts.  The crown that tilts whenever a teacher tells them they will never be, when the neighbor ignores rather than reach out, when the community walks by without acknowledging the existence or acknowledging the greatness that has been sacrificed by the KINGS and QUEENS before us.

So again you may ask why do I consider my children royalty?  Why am I so sure people of color are royalty?  Am I saying that our non-melanin counterparts are not, or cannot be royalty.  ABSOLUTELY NOT!  All of our children are born with the gift of the crown.  What we teach them about self love, spiritual growth, and the spirit of curiosity is how they learn to wear the crown.  I encourage my children to live, swim, breathe in the acknowledgement of our ancestors, the power of their future and the limitless expectations they have available.

These gifts make each one of our children different but so yet so similar.  Let me be clear....the melanin that has been placed in their skin is the crown you see but what you don't see are their inner strengths, struggles, accomplishments and triumphs.  What you don't see, in comparison to their non-melanin counterparts, is the privilege seen and given at birth.  What you don't see, in the lives of our K.I.T., are the constant reminders of low expectations at birth.

The type of crown my boys wear cannot be taken from them by any other person regardless of their lineage or namesake.  My kings use their crowns to stand tall, and be the example of what other boys/men should emulate when searching for their crown. They have the  ability to spot another King and acknowledge royalty is not competition but necessary representation of life.


We are raising a generation of ROYALTY.  Let's all be held accountable for the level of each of their crowns.